Jumping the Shark: How I Met Your Mother Edition

It happens to good shows all the time. They start off amazing, then something happens and it all goes to shit. I have a hard time letting these once enthralling gems go. So I get stuck watching crap and longing for the days when I actually cared. But sometimes it gets so bad you just have to throw in the towel.

A prime example of a show jumping the shark is How I Met Your Mother. Remember when you cared who the mother was? When Marshall and Lily were awesome? When Robin was witty and Barney was legen…wait for it…dary! Now Ted is a giant douche bag, Robin and Lily have lost their funny and Marshall is sad all the time. Please stop torturing your audience. This isn’t Lost. Stop flashing forward to the future where shit is going down. That begs another question: why isn’t this story set in the future, it seems so much more interesting there? And just stop with the yellow umbrella already.

What happened to the writers on this show? Maybe they just stopped caring because they used to churn out golden comedic moments like the slap bet, the bro code and Robin Sparkles. Now all we get is a forced relationship between Barney and Robin and the death of Marshall’s father. WTF? Don’t kill people on sitcoms. This should be a sacred rule. It doesn’t work in comedy. Death isn’t funny.

So I guess there is something to be said about going out when you’re on top. I think Ferris Bueller said it best: “You’re still here? It’s over. Go home.”

100 Most Influential People of the Millennium

Let me take you back...way back. To 1999. I was living in a house with a gaggle of girls in Kingston. Six ladies, one bathroom. It was like Lord of the Flies. But that's not really the point of this story. Shortly before New Year's A&E was airing a special about the 100 most influential people of the millennium. This list included the likes of Einstein, Freud, Newton, Pasteur, Hitler, Ghandi etc. We were sat around our tiny 90's tube tv watching this special (let's take a moment to apprciate the effin' sweetness of modern tv's... ok you're done now). For a reason that has been lost to time, Aimee and I had to leave the house before the show was over. Upon our return we asked our roomate, Cooter (though it wasn't her real name) who was number one on the list. Mind you, when we left I think it was at number 5 or so and it was Shakespeare.

"It was Steve Guttenberg." Cooter responded with great confidence.

"Like Police Academy Steve Guttenberg?!? He ranks above Napoleon and Abe Lincoln?" I asked, clearly taken aback by how much Three Men and a Baby really meant to people.

"The guy who invented the printing press was in Police Academy?"

"No, I don't think so. But I'm pretty sure he was in Short Circuit." sometimes I can't resist...

The post script here is that to this day whenever Aimee or I see or hear about Steve Guttenberg we always mention that he was the most influential person of the millennium. From now on I hope that you will too.

The Power of David Lee Roth Compels You

It was a rainy Tuesday. I was waiting for a streetcar after work with a sorry excuse for an umbrella. A disheveled drunk man was pestering the commuters around me. I knew it was only a matter of time until he made his way to me. Crazy folks on the street just do that. I had my trusty iPod and I hoped that maybe I could get away with the old 'I can't hear you, so you're not there'. I couldn't and we (me and the smelly drunk guy, not me and my trusty iPod) had the following exchange.

"Hi. Hi. Hi." drunky slurred in my face.

I tried to ignore him.

"HI. HEY."

I pulled out my earphone and hoped to Christ that the streetcar shows up real soon.

"Yeah." says I.

"Are you (hic) are you listening to Black Sabbath?" asked the wino thickly.

"No. Van Halen."

"Well. You have a good night, sweetheart." said the drunk brightly and coherently.

And with that he wandered away. True story. The power of David Lee Roth compelled him.